Self-Awareness

This weekend the town I live in is having it's annual Clam Festival. My neighbor was being helpful and decided to give me an extra brochure for the event. He described the festival as being very "middle America" but also something that I should not miss.

I leafed through the flyer and saw a number of events that seemed fitting for such a festival. Bike races, cook-offs, parades and plenty of information about the food vendors and what they would be selling. I mention all of this because I find myself, despite myself, not wanting to go. Running past the strip of main street where they are setting up the stalls I found myself shaking my head. Something in what my neighbor said really rang true for me about this event. In fact it is by and large a good deal of my problem with most events regardless of where I live. My own self-awareness keeps me from enjoying them. Furthermore I often do not even attend.

My wife has assured me for quite some time that all of these thoughts will fall by the wayside once we have children. That I will find myself at these events or even better (or worse) at theme parks and that the children's enjoyment will bring me enjoyment. I try and say little because there is no way to know until the time comes, but part of me very much hopes that she is right. The idea of watching some of the bluegrass bands this weekend (even though I do not like bluegrass) appeals to me, because it seems like something nice and different to do.